Spider-Man rides the short bus

Sometimes I wish I were one of those people who carries a camera everywhere, because sometimes I see something that's just so... random... curious... amusing... bizarre... And I want to share it so others can be amused and curious, too, but a photo would be a far more effective and succinct way to do so than any words I could attempt might.

For example, when you've got a photo like this (and a clever caption to accompany it), do you really even need to say anything else? Of course not.

Unfortunately, as I am not so well prepared for instantly documenting the ridiculous in daily life, my description of what I saw yesterday as I returned to work from a lunch-time trip to Target will have to suffice.

I pulled up at a stop sign behind one of those half-a-school-buses that typically transport special needs kids and other students with an out-of-the-ordinary schedule or route. (Side note: I was never even aware of the "short bus" jokes until about six years ago, when someone at work made some crack to insult a not-too-bright co-worker by saying she "rode the short bus" to school. In my very small hometown, I rode the short bus during my first year of school simply because it made no sense to send a full-sized bus to transport 10 kids at the end of our half-day kindergarten class. So yeah, I "rode the short bus." Shut up; I'm not ashamed.)

Anyway, so I pulled up behind the short bus and, through the dusty and mud-spattered emergency door window, saw one thing that stood out among the usual dangling legs and backs of heads of the rest of the young bus occupants. Splayed into the aisle was an adult-sized [presumably male] leg arrayed in the unmistakably recognizable blue and red spandex tights of a Spider-Man unitard.

Since I'm not the type of person who can see an adult male leg wearing Spider-Man tights on a bus in the suburbs in the middle of the day and NOT wonder what the story is, all sorts of possibilities began traipsing through my mind. As it's mid-April, a costume party was not a likely explanation... Was Spider-Man there to protect the other riders from the rude and insensitive children who might yell their "short bus" taunts as the bus occupants reached their stop? Was he just catching a ride to expedite his arrival at some location where his services were needed? (I imagine that the lack of any tall buildings in the area makes his usual leaping and web-throwing mode of travel significantly more difficult and overt.) Did a kid on the bus win some type of "spend the day with Spidey" contest and brought him to school for show and tell? Was it simply just laundry day, and the wearer of the tights had nothing else to put on? Was he maybe wearing only the tights, and the rest of the obviously eccentric guy's outfit was some odd juxtaposition of tuxedo shirt, cargo shorts, and Viking helmet?

These are the things I was left contemplating as I returned to work for a stimulating afternoon of technical editing. I'm not saying a report on public safety radio interoperability can't be interesting in its own way, but can you blame me if my mind wanders when I have questions like these left unanswered?