Sunday, May 11, 2008

Oh look! More bullets! Plus an announcement of more interesting things to come.

So tell me. Has anyone figured out yet how to swap the week so that five days of it is weekend and only two is workweek (for the same full-time pay, of course)? No? Didn't think so. Well, let me know when you do, OK?

It does feel good to be so very busy and productive and social butterfly-like lately, but frankly there is a shelf life on this sort of lifestyle for me. If I wanted to sacrifice all of my precious sitting-around time (not to mention all of my expendable income), I'd have a child or something.

Because I get one frightening step closer to becoming my mother every day Because you all like bullet points so much, I feel compelled to list for you everything I did this weekend that has prevented me from my usual coveted hours of sloth and lethargy. Are you ready? Since Friday afternoon when I left work, I have...

  • Mowed my lawn for the first time this spring. (My sexist mower started on the ninth pull, a new record for first mow of the season. It must have heard me claim that George Bush wants me to buy an electric start mower with my "What Recession?" check. The damn thing knows it's on thin ice this year.)

  • Aerated said lawn and attempted to patch some bare spots as well. (Look at me pretending I know how to make things grow! Regardless, I have a feeling in June I'll be cursing what I'm convinced is placebo grass seed yet again.)

  • Incurred an injury cleaning my bathroom.

  • Spent three hours making and frosting cupcakes for my good friend Amy's birthday, only to be shut down by the cake Nazis at the roller rink (who have decided that you can bring cake to a birthday party only if you've officially registered your party as a birthday party. Hrmph.)

  • Survived three hours at a roller rink without falling or knocking over any wobbly or ill-mannered children on skates. (Again, I didn't fall at all while roller skating, but I incurred an injury cleaning my bathroom.)

  • Ate banned cake in a parking lot in the rain.

  • Attended MSP's first Ghetto Gourmet event.

  • Did a bit more basement-project-related cleaning, painting, and Mod Podging.

  • Had a Mother's Day brunch with my two sisters while our mother was all by herself back at home.

  • Painfully jammed my finger rinsing a dish at said brunch. (Did I mention I also injured myself cleaning my bathroom? As I whimpered to myself after the dish-rinsing incident, I had to cry, "WHY do I keep hurting myself in such stupid ways?!?")

  • Finally hung the over-the-door storage shelf I've had sitting in my kitchen for over a month, and the battery-operated light I bought for my closet two months ago as well.

  • Managed to stab a small hole in my kitchen floor with a drill bit while hanging that storage shelf. Realized (two days too late) that this weekend was not the best weekend for me to try to be handy.

  • Did the usual weekend laundry and grocery shopping and Target-going thing. (Managed to accomplish all of those tasks without incident or bloodshed.)

Notably absent from this list? "Bonded with my couch" and "Slept until double digit hours." Perhaps that has something to do with the even greater than usual lack of coordination.

On an entirely different note, tomorrow shall be a very exciting day at Stefanie Says, as I'll be hosting a guest post from a good friend who's no stranger to several of you as well. This isn't Blog Share, so it won't be an anonypost, but I'll let you wait until tomorrow to find out who'll be posting anyway. Oooh, a mystery. Can you think of a more fun way to start the week? I sure can't, but then, I've been hurting myself completing routine household chores. Apparently any change from the norm is a welcome one for me.


Aaron said...

I was going to make fun of your injuries, but then I remembered that I was the guy who crushed his pinkie under a weight at the gym not too long ago. We'll call this one even.

shelleycoughlin said...

My mom would have driven to my house to punch me and my sister out if we had brunch without her on Mother's Day. Your mother seems much more laidback. And also, less violent.

lizgwiz said...

I love it that I'm not the only person in the world who injures herself in embarrassing ways. ;)

Stefanie said...

Aaron--That actually sounds like a totally reasonable injury to me. But then, I'm hobbling in pain and sporting a band-aid on my wrist because of a bathroom cleaning injury, so I might not have the best perspective on this sort of thing.

NPW--You're right; she's not particularly violent. More important, however, she lives six hours away. My little sister happened to be in town this weekend; otherwise the three of us wouldn't have been in the same place either.

Liz--Indeed, you are not. Ouch.

Anonymous said...

Good job on the lawn! The grass in our backyard is frighteningly long, but H refuses to mow it. It is driving me crazy. But if I break down and mow it, he wins.

Those cupcakes look great! Sorry you couldn't bring them into the rink.

L Sass said...

Damn, girl, you were productive! I felt very productive and busy this weekend and I didn't do half of what you did!

Anonymous said...

Wow, you were Little Miss Productivity this weekend! I'm tres impressed. And sorry about your injuries.

Courtney said...

Now, exactly what part of your body did you injure cleaning the bathroom and how did it happen? You can't leave us hanging like this, Stefanie.

Mickey said...

Really? They cake-blocked? Damn.

(Say it out loud; it's funnier that way.)

Stefanie said...

R--Why does H refuse to mow it? Has he decided to grow a jungle this year? Or is he just into shirking his stereotypical manly duties?

L Sass and Lara--I did indeed feel very productive after all that. And also very tired. Boo.

Courtney--I am limping because of a blunt trauma to my upper thigh, and I have a gash bandaged on my inner wrist. It's all very ridiculous. Perhaps I'll write about it tomorrow, but really the mystery is probably more entertaining than the reality.

Mickey--It's funny either way. :-)

Whiskeymarie said...

I, too, am wondering lately where the sloth has gone. Every weekend & "free" moment seems jam-packed.

But this weekend? Not so much. Yay!!!

Oh- and as someone who injured herself on the butter compartment of her refrigerator- I feel your pain.

Stefanie said...

Your butter compartment?? Now that is a story I'd like to hear. (Also, thank you for that. I feel much less ridiculous now, as I'm obviously in good company.)

Noelle said...

Your placebo grass seed must be related to my fake pepper seeds.