Thursday, December 04, 2008

As we all know, Obama won on the much-debated mozzarella platform.

Well then. I received more comments on that last post than I did on any post through all of NaBlo. This is not a news flash: people love to participate! God bless the geniuses who created polling tools for our blogs. Today I thought of at least three topics on which to poll you again. And then I realized that perhaps I should make some of my own decisions, instead of letting the Internet make them for me. Whatever. Who can I trust, if not the Internet? Clearly mob mentality is always the wisest, sagest choice.

That said, I was happy to see that the bulk of you agreed with me that it was, in fact, a shirt wiener that the boring man who will NOT be my next boyfriend was sporting. Most of you did not agree with my suspicion that it was intentional, but at least thus far zero percent of you have thought it was intentional and hilarious. Whew.

On to other topics, brought to you in bullet-point style, just the way the lazy and attention-deficit among us like them. Am I wrong?

  • I saw Australia last night, and because I still have not succumbed to the allure of Twitter, I instead thereafter changed my Facebook status to "Stefanie thinks that maybe Baz Luhrmann needs an editor." It's not so much that I didn't like it; it's just that it was absurd that there was so much of it. Within those three hours were at least three separate movies, but rather than pick one, Baz (can I call you "Baz"?) decided to cram together all three. I think the following quote from the reviews compiled at Rotten Tomatoes summed it up best:

    "You don't find many three-hour fairy tale love story war films about race relations featuring the ultra-competitive beef market in northern Australia. For good reason."

    I saw this one with my new friend (former boyfriend candidate) AW, who added that, "Nicole Kidman as the tough-but-dainty woman sophisticate in the cowboy frontier is a bit tired. Didn't she play that role in, like, five other movies?" I agreed with him, even though by "five other movies" I think he meant "Cold Mountain." I suppose when you find a type-casting that works for you, you go with it. Isn't that right, Jodie Foster? (Note: For that last link, special thanks go to my ridiculously astute memory for seemingly useless details, as well as the beauty of blog search boxes.)

  • Shockingly, I actually have two candidates in the Catch dot Mom queue at the moment that I'm feeling ever so slightly optimistic about. One of them answered my request that my match know the difference between "your" and "you're" by noting that he "not only knows the difference between 'your' and 'you're,' but 'YORE' as well." Be still my nerdy heart. The other one said, in response to my first email to him, that he could tell I was a writer before even looking at my profile, such was the fine craftwork of my message. Flattery will get you everywhere, sir. Or, it might, if you would actually write me back again. I fear that dating karma may in fact be biting me in the rear. I neglect to write back to a slightly "off"-looking guy I've entered preliminary communication with, and my payback is a similar slighting from someone I actually do want to meet. Sigh. Eventually interest will line up simultaneously, right? Let's cross our fingers on that, OK?

  • Meanwhile, I received another message from The Traffic Engineer today, asking if I'd like to see one of the Oscar-worthy movies out right now (Australia, perhaps? Thanks, but I already sat through that.) or check out a new restaurant some night. "I'd be up for it as a date or just friends," he says, but then added "My treat!" Oh, Nice Guy Who Does Nothing For Me... What am I to say to you? Incidentally, this was one of the topics I considered polling you folks on. I should probably just deal with it myself, though, right?

  • As you may or may not know (depending on whether you read any of the posts I submitted in the last days of NaBloPoMo, while the rest of you were off neglecting the Internet), my parents were here last weekend, and my father brought with him an absurd amount of cheese for my sister and me. I know he means well; I know that bringing things we do not need and cannot possibly use is just his way of saying he loves us and he's thinking about us and wants to provide for us in some strange, small way. But really. Family-sized bags of cheese curds, string cheese, and mozzarella whips for each of us? What would happen to my already squashy midsection (much less my digestive system) if I ate all of that? Not wanting it to go to waste, however, I portioned off a small share for myself to keep at home and I brought the rest in to work. Most of my coworkers were appreciative. Who doesn't like free cheese as a mid-day snack? Who except the adversarial young conservative who, when hearing from whence the mystery cheese in the kitchen came, spouted some wisecrack about it being LIBERAL cheese, and hoping that eating it wouldn't turn him Democrat. I assured him that the free cheese was actually purchased and provided by a Bush-supporting, Clinton-and-Obama-hating Republican, but I'm not sure it set his fears at ease. CHEESE, people. CHEESE is now political! Oh, when will the madness end?

    * Link provided for those of you not raised in Wisconsin. Sadly, I couldn't find a similar explanation for mozzarella whips (which are really just skinny string cheese; surely you can imagine that).


The Dutchess of Kickball said...

Cheese curds are totally to die for. I want your bag right now!

lizgwiz said...

I've been craving cheese like crazy lately. Too bad your dad didn't come to visit ME.

OF COURSE you should try another date with the Traffic Engineer. Chemistry sometimes takes time to grow. (You totally know I'm kidding, right?) If you enjoy his company at all, though, you should take him up on his offer of dinner as friends, HIS TREAT. In this economy, a girl's gotta take all the free meals she can get, is what I'm sayin'. ;)

nancypearlwannabe said...

Aww, the Traffic Engineer wouldn't even make you pay for him? That IS sweet!

Jess said...

Mmm. Now I could really go for some cheese.

That quote about Australia from Rotten Tomatoes is hilarious.

Mickey said...

I have known a disproportionate number of Wisconsinites (Wisconsonians?) in my life while never having set foot in the state itself. Those people are everywhere and they bring their cheese with them.

I'm not complaining.

Anonymous said...

I LOVE that you are known as the liberal at your office. Bless your thoroughly blue heart! Around my job, you look like an way-odd duck if you are a Republican. Or a Christian.

I totally forgot about The Traffic Engineer. It might be best just to release him. Last night I had a date with The Arty Handyman. (You should see his adorable card. A mighty hand clutching a wrench!)

Whiskeymarie said...

That dude totally doesn't deserve fine Wisconsin cheese.

flurrious said...

Nicole Kidman was also a plucky, born-to-money pioneer in Far and Away, which also starred her crazypants then-husband Tom Cruise as a tiny but scrappy bareknuckles boxer. That movie is one of the reasons I rarely see Nicole Kidman movies.

I think it's a dad thing to give some type of useful item, but in a larger quantity than you could ever want or need. Many years ago, I complained about having a noisy neighbor, so my dad gave me about 50 sets of earplugs. This was about the same time that my friend Julie's dad gave her a grocery bag full of rubber gloves.

Courtney said...

I love that people living in Wisconsin carry cheese around with them and give it out as gifts. It fits directly into my Wisconsin stereotype.

Remember the Friends episode where Phoebe was dating two guys that both ended up being perfect and she had to choose between them? I bet that will happen to you with the two guys in your queue, only you won't blow it with both of them like she did.

badger reader said...

Is there really not a great selection of cheese in Minnesota? Having never lived outside of Wisconsin, I am not familiar with other grocery stores (doesn't everyone have a cheese aisle?) When a friend was living in Minnesota (Outside Minneapolis, but not too far outside) he always asked me to fill a cooler with cheese and Johnsonville brats when I would visit. I never really thought about whether it was hard to come by these things up there or whether he was just too financially strapped to afford such yumminess. I say your dad is sweet and considerate to bring you the treats and you are awesome for sharing the cheese love with others!

Alice said...

alas, the same dating karma is kicking me, too. i get a LOT of emails from dudes who.. uh.. really? no. and now i have at least 2 guys who are ignoring my emails. the weird part is that one of them emailed me FIRST, and i REPLIED, and he's still ignoring me. WHATEVER.

Stefanie said...

Dutchess--Well, if you worked at my office, you could have them! (You would have to work with a bunch of Republicans, ;-) but you would have free cheese!)

Liz--Too bad indeed.

NPW--Sweet, and also a little sad, don't you think? I think the guy is lonely.

Jess--I know, right? It still makes me chuckle.

Mickey--It's Wisconsinites. And I'm glad you're not complaining. :-)

Carrie--I know; it IS odd, isn't it, given the true-blue majority of the rest of the Twin Cities. Lucky me.

WM--Good point.

Flurrious--How did I forget about Far and Away?? You're right; she totally played the same character there, and the ending was just as implausible and ridiculous.

Courtney--I wouldn't say that people from Wisconsin routinely carry cheese with them! If you want to think that, though, I won't stop you. And I DO remember that Friends episode! I actually referenced it when I was in a "dating two men" scenario just a couple months ago! (It didn't end as badly as with Phoebe, but I still have no boyfriend to show for it.)

Badger Reader--No, we do have cheese in Minnesota (and Johnsonville brats, too). I think my dad just thinks he's being helpful.

Alice--Isn't that the worst? When THEY contact YOU first, and then disappear? Whatever, dude.

Noelle said...

Yore! I wish that dude lived in Po-town.

And you are so right on the money about Nicole Kidman. In Australia, when she kicked off her uppity society demeanor, I was not surprised in the least, because that is indeed what she always does.

Allie said...

My husband is from the midwest, and his family's relationship with cheese is not something I will ever understand.

kwr221 said...

You don't know me, but I read you all the time... Thanks for all the dating stories...

here's an Award:

anna said...

Oh my gosh Stefanie, I had a profile on Yahoo personals a few months ago. I wasn't quite inspired and wrote about 4 lines, but one of them was something about how I wouldn't respond to anyone who used "your" instead of "you're." That and a funny picture caught my current boyfriend's eye - we had our first date two months ago. Being a stickler for grammar can pay off!