Wednesday, December 31, 2008

I suppose I still have a few hours to make that "Soul Mate in '08" thing happen, but I'm totally not holding my breath.

At the risk of starting a routine wherein I begin every post with a claim that time is slipping by suspiciously quickly, I still need to say, "Was Christmas already a week ago?" Whoopsie. Still want an update on that?

Actually, I thought perhaps we were all taking a little break between the holidays, but the 300+ unread posts I saw in my feed reader last night suggest that's not the case. I don't know how the rest of you found time to post during the past week. Me, I was far too busy with impromptu little experiments, such as "Let's see how many movies in a row I can watch on my parents' couch before I actually have to get up and check for muscle atrophy" and "Let's count how many consecutive days I can go without eating a vegetable." Oh, and of course, there were those couple of days in there where I actually had to go in to WORK, because apparently not everyone is in agreement that regardless of which days of the week the holidays fall upon, the last week of December is for lounging with a cookie in one hand and a wine glass in the other. Rest assured; I plan to write my Congressman about this immediately.

Today, however, I am off, and at 3:17 p.m., I am still sitting in my pajamas, drinking the last glass from a bottle of white I opened earlier this week. What? Is 3:17 in the afternoon too early for wine? Come on; it is NEW YEAR'S! Surely that warrants a pass. Besides that, the cork on this bottle was stamped with the letters "Rx" after the winery's web address. I'm sure that is some sort of registered trademark-related indicator, but I prefer to believe this wine is a prescription! Just yesterday I joined the Facebook group titled, "A glass of wine solves everything." It's a remedy worth trying, I say.

The fact is I've been feeling a bit low lately. I was attributing it to my uncharacteristically irrational disappointment over the vanishing act played by my supposed best date of '08. I realize it was just one date, and for me to feel so defeated and deflated after it is really not in keeping with my usual cynicism and guardedness where dating is concerned. Still, I have spent the past week and a half wallowing about, crying "I don't get it; I don't GET IT!" and "It's not fair. How is this fair??" Is it not my freaking turn already? Have I not paid my damn dues? I sound like a goddamned Lifetime movie. I realize this, of course. And I'm also ashamed to admit that a good portion of this disappointment likely stems from what that stupid psychic told me in 2007. When I met someone I actually liked right at the end of the year, I wanted to believe that she was right, and I actually would find my soul mate in '08. It's silly, I know; you don't have to tell me that or chide my naivety. It's not that I truly believed her, of course, but that I just really wanted to. Sending positive vibes out into the universe is all I thought I was doing. Who knew it would send me into such a bleak place.

It's not only the afore-nicknamed Bachelor #3, however. Rereading my New Year's-adjacent posts from the past two years, I've realized end-of-year melancholy is nothing new for me. We're supposed to think of new beginnings and starting overs, of the things we accomplished and gained in the year past. Instead, I dwell on things lost or never found. I think of things I didn't do, goals I didn't meet because I didn't set. This time of year puts me in a weird place. Surely that's not just me, right? Sadly, I have a feeling that a cheerful New Year's spirit isn't the norm for many of us.

All that said, I do have to acknowledge that 2008 was not all bad. I have good friends who I love dearly. In this scary economy, I still have a job and a home and a meager savings account balance. I even accomplished two and a half of my five resolutions for the year. I could do worse than 50%, don't you think?

The end of the year is a time for wrap-ups and summaries, of course, so to review, here is my list, my year-in-review, my Stefanie Says clip show for 2008.

January: Foolishly proclaimed it the Year of Stef, hoping luck in romance would follow. (Ha.) Discovered a new way to Internet-stalk old friends and love interests. Grew a Chia Elephant. Discovered the pack rat gene is dominant. (Also, learned my grandma didn't like lima beans.)

February: Won my city's first (and only) Drunken Spelling Bee. (The bee lives on, but with the decidedly less fun-sounding "Grown-up Spelling Bee" label.) Coined the term "Venn Diagram of Snobbery." Lost my grandma.

March: Celebrated National Grammar Day. Realized I shouldn't be trusted alone in my own house. Cleared 50 years of clutter from my basement. Celebrated my 34th birthday and my third blogiversary. Tested my domesticity by taking a quilting class.

April: Finally met Lara! And NPW! And Red! And got to hang out with Noelle again, too! (Spring vacation in Boston and Philly was a definite highlight of the year.) Played along in the first Choose Your Own Blogventure story game. Discovered I can find things to eat in the Produce section (and ate those things for eleven-plus days in a row). Learned to knit socks.

May: Brought our friend Darren back to the Internet. Injured myself while cleaning my shower. Gave my newly refinished basement a coming out party. Got yelled at by a fellow motorist.

June: Played with that nifty Flickr mosaic tool (and promptly forgot about it until now). Had my very first fifteen-cent meal of Ramen noodles. Ran into a past meMarmony match in a crowd of 8,000 people. Was reminded that I really should wear a helmet and knee pads in daily life.

July: Started reading those crazy teenage vampire books. Summed up my life in Someecard format. Considered the possible merits of attending my first National Night Out block party.

August: Fixed my car's air conditioner, all by myself (well, by myself with help from the Internet and a fellow blogger). Got massaged by a giant middle-aged black man. Ever-so-unoriginally was brought to tears by traffic. Wrote my first [part of a] science fiction story, for CYOB 2.0.

September: Watched St. Paul turn into a police state. Infiltrated the Republican National Convention (or something like that). Realized I have no idea how to effectively tell a guy "Thanks, but no thanks." Finally caved to peer pressure and joined Facebook. Learned how to make a coffee cup of cake in the microwave.

October: Enjoyed a lovely fall weekend in the woods. Brought our pal Nabbalicious back to the Internet. Played the field a little bit. Photographed giant gourds and scary antique store finds with good friends.

November: For the third year in a row, posted every day for a damn month. Realized that writing about dating isn't nearly as fun when I force myself to do it daily. And hmm... I swear something else happened that month... What was it?... Oh yeah! Obama! Sigh.

December: Had fun with poll tools (and profile pictures). Fed my coworkers liberal cheese. Unintentionally insulted a man who had just bought me dinner. Spent another Christmas evening at the emergency room. (This time, to have my dad's frostbitten fingers reexamined. He is fine, but I fear a trend is starting. We could use some family traditions, I suppose, but can't the movie and Chinese buffet be our new tradition instead?)

Also, I saw 75 movies, went to 20 concerts and shows, and read a measly 12 books.

All in all, I suppose it was a fine year, soul mate or no. Scouring my archives to summarize all of that has taken considerably longer than I intended, however, and now it's high time to ditch the teacup-printed flannel pants and gray hoodie and get myself ready for tonight's New Year's Eve festivities. I hope everyone has a safe and happy evening. To reuse a joke that certainly never gets old, see you next year!


flurrious said...

It sounds like you had a relatively decent year, absence of soulmate notwithstanding. (Although maybe the giant middle-aged ... naaaah, never mind.)

Courtney said...

I say this most definitely was the Year of Stef. You did a ton of really cool things! And since when do we let men determine what kind of year we have?

That said, I hope 2009 is even better. The Year of Super Stef, perhaps? Happy New Year!

Poppy said...

On New Year's Eve booze rules do not apply.

A fantastic nostalgia recap.

How about this? "2009, the man is mine!"

Happy New Year!!!

Miss Pants said...

I have really enjoyed reading your blog during the past year! I'm sorry I've sort of fallen out of whack with my normal reading and writing patterns. I hope the next year will bring you all that you want!

lizgwiz said...

Okay, Blogger ate my first comment of 2009. Let's try this again.

I hope that 2009 is the Romance Year of Stef AND Liz! (Separately, of course...not together. I mean, I LIKE you, but I don't LIKE LIKE you. Hee.)

I always get a little down, too...when I realize another year is gone and I haven't really "accomplished" anything. But hey--I made it through the year. That's something.

Alice said...

i don't usually get too down at the end of the year, but i think it's mostly because i have the attention span of a flea. i'd have to think about the past year for more than, like, 35 seconds at a time.

michelle of bleeding espresso said...

I loved your recap and I'm sorry about the disappearing dude. Aside from being annoying, that's just not a cool way to end the year. But's 2009! The *real* Year of Stef! Woohoo!

NGS said...

When we got home after two weeks of flitting about from parent house to parent house, I immediately ran to the store and bought lettuce. Because all I wanted was a giant salad. Next year I'm putting in on the Christmas list. What I really want is for you to put some fresh produce in your house when I come visit!! I love the fudge, but a girl can only take so much!

Anonymous said...

Hang in there! I have a very good feeling about 2009. And, after all, you are awesome. Smart, attractive, fun- it will absolutely happen. For now, just relax and enjoy.

nancypearlwannabe said...

You renovated your entire basement! That is surely something to be proud of. Don't worry, I'm putting in a good word with the big guy* that this is to be your year for soulmate-finding.

*the big guy being... umm, Chris.

Jess said...

OK, it might not have been the Year of Stef that you were hoping for, but it was still quite a year! Here's hoping 2009 is even better.

3carnations said...

So that end of the year guy never responded? What the heck?

Stefanie said...

Flurrious--People keep telling me that maybe I MET my soul mate in '08 and just don't know he's my soul mate yet. You know... as if THAT's helpful. But the giant middle-aged black man? I think it's a safe bet it's not him.

Courtney--True; men don't determine what sort of year we have. In this case, they just determined how I felt as the year ended. :-(

Poppy--So I should start chanting that right now? OK...

Pants--Well, I understand. You're busy being in LOVE and all. Lucky girl. I think YOU got "my" year instead!

Liz--We don't have to "LIKE like" each other to make that Golden Girls plan happen... It may be just a few short years away, my friend!

Alice--Ha. Well, that's one way to look at it... :-)

Michelle--I know, right? NOT cool. I hope his relationship karma is dinged accordingly.

NGS--I just had a salad myself! When I finally got home from the seemingly unending series of travels and social outings, the first thing I wanted to do was buy healthy perishables.

Monkey--Oh, you're sweet. I hope you're right. Thanks.

NPW--Chris has power when it comes to soulmate-finding? Is there anything that man CAN'T do?

Jess--Here's hoping indeed. It seems people all over the Internet are thinking big thoughts for '09. Might as well join them, I guess.

3Cs--Nope. Nothing. Nada. What the heck indeed.

Mickey said...

I'm a little surprised that I remember most of your year. I've never even met you! Isn't this internet thing crazy!

You had a pretty solid year.