Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Apparently I'm so desperate for a topic that I'm posting other people's baby photos. (I promise I won't make a habit of this.)

Hey there! How are you? Guess what I have still not done yet? If you guessed "Hooked up your new scanner?" then you are smart. Or I am predictably lazy. Frankly, both are quite good possibilities, I must say. Is anyone still actually waiting for the inevitably disappointing artist's rendering of my royal blue Hee-Haw dress or Miss Prom Pants's triangle hair? I didn't think so. Moving on then.

In lieu of any prom-related photos or drawings, how about we take a decidedly different turn and pretend this is a knitting blog again for a bit? GG showed off her baby-blanket-in-progress yesterday, so I think I will just pretend that was a meme and show you the one I recently finished as well. Here it is:

I started this a couple months ago and actually completed the bulk of it while watching some very inappropriate-for-small-children things on DVD. If you consult my movie list for early January, you'll see that during the time I was knitting this, I watched Pulp Fiction, The Last Kiss, the Enron documentary, and Kids. I sincerely hope that this blanket is in no way now tainted by its unintentional association with extreme violence, infidelity, corporate greed and corruption, rampant drug abuse, and loose sexual morals as a result.

I shared this concern with Darren a few weeks ago, and he offered the very good suggestion that I wrap the blanket around my TV and leave it on PBS all day while I'm at work in the hopes that some wholesome programming would somehow set things right. Instead, I guess I am just going to trust that the sweetness that is the tiny recipient of the blanket will overcome its shady beginnings. I mean, just look at this little guy. He could warn off all bad blanket juju, don't you think?

I handed over the blanket at a party held in this little man's honor Sunday. Can you believe he didn't even have the decency to stay awake for it? The nerve. He did wake up eventually, however... just in time for his Barynya practice.

(FYI: No, I did not know the word "Barynya" on my own. I'll admit I looked it up. Surprisingly, it's not as easy as you might think to find the proper name for "Russian dance with lots of squatting and jumping." Luckily, I've got mad Google skillz.)

In this one, I'm pretty sure little Will is saying, "Hey dude, got some spare change? Come on, help a brother out." (I guess Barynya doesn't really pay the bills, after all.)

And in this one, it seems he's saying, "Gah! Get me away from this lady!" Or possibly, "Hey, is that a cookie you've got back there? A Tagalong, perhaps? Can I have me some of that?"

OK, frankly I'm not all that great at putting words in infants' mouths, so I'll stop this nonsense now. There's a reason I wasn't a co-writer on Look Who's Talking, after all (and that reason wasn't only the fact that it was a dreadful and mind-numbing movie... nor that I was only 15 when it came out and, believe it or not, was not any sort of child screen-writing genius in demand by TriStar and all its subsidiaries).

Anyway, the shower was lovely, with fine snacks and only two silly games--neither of which I won, thankfully (the enormous canisters of Kahlua- and Baileys-filled chocolates looked like an awesomely tasty prize, but me and the extra eight pounds I'm carrying around lately really don't need that sort of temptation in our home). And little Will is pretty much near perfect, I guess, which seems only fitting considering what cool parents he's got. Congratulations, J and D. I'm sure you've lots of fun times with him ahead.


-R- said...

Uh oh. My baby blanket in progress has been witness to quite a bit of tv violence as well. I just won't tell the parents, and if the baby turns into a crazy violent person, they will never know it was my fault.

Tristar wasn't scouting 15 year olds in Wisconsin? Their loss.

lizgwiz said...

I think it's perfectly fine to exploit other people's children for a blog post, as long as they're really cute. Which this one is! (Love the randomly fluffy hair.)

Why do we have to play silly games at showers? The only one I ever really enjoyed was toilet paper bride. Hee.

L Sass said...

I love that baby. He's too cute!!

Your blanket is beautiful! I like to knit, too, but only ever manage to get tiny hats finished for baby gifts. It's the slacker handmade gift!

Noelle said...

For the record, I wasn't too worried about seeing triangular hair, until you mentioned it again. Now I'm curious again to know how that works.

It's too bad you didn't win the candy because it's a little known fact that food has no calories if you didn't buy it yourself. Even more so if said food is won as a prize.

don't call me MA'AM said...

I have been waiting for your artistic rendition of the HEE HAW dress, as well as Triangle Hair. Patiently waiting. :-)

Knitting intrigues me, but I don't know how. I do know how to crochet, but I rarely get past the potholder or the long 4-5 row "scarf." haha Great blanket!

metalia said...

He's so cute, and the blanket is gorgeous; I love that it's not typical "baby" colors. Also? You have beautiful eyes, my friend!

Paisley said...

What a sweet baby! I love the sleeping picture.

I think we have the same glasses!!!

P.S. You look really pretty in that last picture.

NancyPearlWannabe said...

He has little crab pinchers! So cute.

stefanie said...

R--I wasn't planning to tell these parents about the tainting of the blanket, either, but since I sent them a link to this post, I suppose the secret's out. Oh well.

Liz--I know; the hair is awesome. Will's mom (my friend Jenny) told me that someone suggested she comb his hair, and she said she totally prefers the fluffy bed-head instead. Her casual proclivity towards the messy and unkempt is one of the many things I love about that woman.

L Sass--I actually should have made a hat instead, as I think mine was one of at least six hand-made baby blankets the couple received. But oh well.

Noelle--I love that theory. What other vices can you rationalize away for me like that?

DCMM--Some day I will actually hook up that damn scanner, and then you just WAIT for all the ridiculous things I am bound to post.

Metalia--Yeah, I like making baby things that aren't the usual tired and tame pastels. The last baby blanket I made was bright red. Oh, and thank you. :-) You have beautiful eyes yourself!

Paisley--I remember thinking the same thing when I saw a picture of you in YOUR glasses. If they're not the same, they're surely damn similar.

NPW--Hee. He does! :-)

The Other Girl said...

That is an adorable baby, and, not to sound like your mom or anything, but you look very much at home holding him. And, my god, girl, you have insanely good skin!

stefanie said...

OG--That's very kind, but I honestly think it was just a lucky photo. (Will was actually squirming and I was thinking, "Am I holding him right?" And the Bare Minerals foundation must just be working in that pic.) :-)