In any case, the Kicking and Screaming I did see this weekend was this one, from 1995. To be fair, the Rotten Tomatoes critics didn't like this film by the same name much better (it pulled in a mere 53% rating on the site), but if they'd asked me to weigh in, it would have a much higher ranking than that.
So anyway, I'm wondering now... has everybody but me already seen this movie? If so, why didn't anyone tell me about it? If not, why didn't we know about it twelve years ago when it was released? Why didn't it fall into the canon of classic young adult slacker angst movies, alongside Reality Bites, Singles, Say Anything, Dazed and Confused, and Empire Records? Why didn't I watch it over and over with my friends, until it became one of those endlessly quotable movies that inexplicably bonds the people who've seen and related to it and perpetually annoys the people who haven't? I mean, come on... consider the evidence...
Oh! I'll tell you the worst thing about losing a foot... Hey, man!
- Is that a pajama top?
- No! ... Yes.
Oh, I've been to Prague. Well, I haven't been to Prague, "been to Prague," but I know that thing... That "stop shaving your armpits, read The Unbearable Lightness of Being, fall in love with a sculptor, now I realize how bad American coffee is" thing.
- How about worst case scenarios after graduation?
- Heart attack.
- Live in Milwaukee.
Go away, Cookie Man.
Oh great! A dictionary! I'm gonna look up "blowjob."
I'm nostalgic for conversations I had yesterday. I've begun reminiscing events before they even occur. I'm reminiscing this right now. I can't go to the bar because I've already looked back on it in my memory, and I didn't have a good time.
Look at this. There's like... food in here. There's food in the beer... It looks like a chicken wing, or a cheese fry.
- I hope you don't mind that I took my shirt off.
- Well, maybe just this once.
Potato is an entree?
I like that you drink. I like a bartender who drinks. Otherwise, I feel like I'm being poisoned.
Hold it. I'm having one of those times when my name sounds weird to me.
And my personal favorite...
- I gotta go. I gotta sleep with a freshman.
- OK, me too. Bye-bye.