People! I fucking WON the first-ever Minneapolis Drunken Spelling Bee. Can you even believe it?? I still pretty much can't. More details later, when it's not 3:10 in the morning and when the alcohol level in my bloodstream isn't such that I'm bound to mistype some very simple word and effectively negate my victory.
Seriously though. I WON. Did you honestly see that coming?? I sure didn't. Wow.
P.S. My defeat in the 1986 Sheboygan County Regional Spelling Bee is officially redeemed. Thank you, and good night.