Monday, July 14, 2008

It still wasn't as scary as when the creepy girl crawled out of the TV at the end of The Ring

Allow me to sum up my weekend in fifteen words or fewer: wind, wind, friends, wine, cookies, wind, chips, wine, wind, boat, board games, wine, wind, wind.

In case you didn't get that, it was windy. "Too chilly to jump in the lake" windy. "Is that tree going to fall on us?" windy. Tragically, "no campfire tonight" windy. At one point I asked no one in particular how it could be so dang windy for so dang long, and although logically I agree with the friend who replied that surely there isn't a finite amount of wind in this world, I still think that if the weather was going to be like that, the prediction for the weekend should have said, "Dust Bowl. Minus the dust. No campfires for you, ya hear?"

Despite the less-than-ideal-for-summer-cabining weather, however, we all had a lovely time. As usual, we had a fantastic spread of both sweet and savory treats, and as usual, I ate entirely too many of them. I got a bit of color on my pasty white self, and my team kicked some proverbial ass in Taboo. I even found a few quiet moments to steal away with my vampire book. All in all, thumbs up on the weekend, I'd say.

Speaking of the crazy vampire book, I was reminded this weekend that, despite the number of grown women who are obsessed with this series, Twilight was, in fact, written for children. How do I know this? Because we had children with us at the cabin, and their twelve-year-old eyes lit up when they saw me pull my book from my bag.

"You're reading TWILIGHT?!?" my friend's daughter and her best friend exclaimed. "Do you like it?? Oooh, it is SOOOO GOOD!!!"

I'm not sure if I was suddenly the coolest grown-up at the cabin or the strangest one, but both girls excitedly gushed to me about how good the sequels are and how poorly cast they think the upcoming movie version is. (Edward is not nearly attractive enough, it seems.) They asked me how far I was in the book, and when I explained that Edward had recently told Bella that she could tell her friends they were secretly dating, both girls swooned with the memory of it all.

I would like to think my relating to the current obsessions of preteens ends there, but last night, flipping through the channels while I ate my dinner, I stumbled across the opening credits of the Disney Channel's exclusive Jonas Brothers movie Camp Rock (something else we heard a lot about this weekend) and I will admit, I watched the whole damn thing. If it redeems myself any, I didn't enjoy it. Seriously, it's no High School Musical, folks. But I'm just going to step right out of this hole before I dig any deeper, OK?

On an entirely different note from an entirely not-G-rated film, how many of you have any recollection of The Serpent and the Rainbow? I brought that one up during a late-night conversation about the scariest movies we've ever seen, but the truth is, I don't really recall if it was inordinately scary or if I just saw it at a particularly fragile age. I've always been a big old 'fraidy cat who could find horror in a bowl of oatmeal, so it wouldn't surprise me if the movie wasn't nearly as scary as I remember. In fact, despite how much it traumatized me, I really don't remember very many details. When I read the plot summary at IMDB, in fact, the story didn't even sound familiar at all. So tell me. Was The Serpent and the Rainbow the movie in which some sinister scary man planted a bug larva in a woman's makeup compact and it later grew under her skin, beneath a big nasty red welt, which finally broke open to allow hundreds of tiny spiders to crawl out? Does that ring a bell to any of you? Because that horrifying scene has been embedded in my brain for 20 years now (and I'm sorry if it's now embedded in yours), so I really ought to know from whence it came. Also, I ought to know that something like that is highly improbable in real life, and therefore when I feel the beginnings of a zit high on my cheek bone (an area typically not at all prone to acne), I should tell myself confidently that the sensitive red spot IS, in fact, just a zit, and no swarm of spiders is going to crawl out of my skin later this week. I mean, not that I'd ever think such a thing. Particularly not today. Nope, not me. (If you'll excuse me, I have to examine my cheek in the mirror once more.)

P.S. Are you all ready for Blog Share 3.0? I am not, since I've yet to write a single word of my anonypost, but ready or not, Blog Share is this week. If it's anything like the last two, you can expect to read secrets and scandals and catharsis galore. I haven't decided which route to go yet, but I'll be hiding out somewhere on these here Interwebs come Wednesday. See you then.


Anonymous said...

Glad that you have fun this weekend in spite of the yucky weather.

My twelve-year-old niece FREAKED out when she saw me reading Twilight. She reacted as if I'd broken the tween text acronym code. I'm still not sure if she thought it was cool or weird to share a love for Twilight.

I don't remember The Serpent and the Rainbow, but I will definitely remember your horrific zit/welt story when I'm putting on makeup tomorrow morning. I will likely send you a frantic email the next time I get a massive monkey zit. :-)

Have you seen Candyman? That movie still scares the pants off me.

Pretty Unfamous said...

I have definitely never heard of that movie. But I HAVE heard of High School Musical and don't think that anyone who is older than high school age should ever watch it. I've never seen it, and don't ever want to. Puh-lease.

But, when I was a teenybopper (although I hate to admit it) I was in love with the Disney Channel Original Movies. They had THE hottest actors. Ever.

shelleycoughlin said...

Hee! Your encounter with the 12 year old girls is pretty much my everyday job.

I, too, have seen both Camp Rock and High School Musical, but not The Serpent and the Rainbow. The pictures alone are enough to ensure nightmares.

Anonymous said...

I've never seen The Serpent and the Rainbow, but when I was a kid (long before the movie), the idea of spider bites leading to swarms of spiders later emerging from the bite site was something kids used to torture each other. But ... that could never happen. Right? RIGHT??? Somebody better say, "right," or I will freak out here and now.

I don't understand why two of the Jonas Brothers have enough eyebrow hair for the whole family, but the third Jonas Brother looks relatively standard.

Courtney said...

Yikes. I have never heard of The Serpent and the Rainbow, but I can assure you I will never be watching it. I saw IT when I was a kid and was so traumatized that I haven't seen a horror movie since.

Also, I'd be interested to know if you find Twilight to be completely ridiculous or secretly kind of awesome in a pre-teen kind of way. Should I pick it up for some fluffy summer reading or not waste my time?

L Sass said...

I am starting Twiglight tonight and I CANNOT wait to be the envy of preteen girls everywhere!

Anonymous said...

I finally finished my Blog Share post!

I do not watch scary movies EVER, so I can't help you there.

Mickey said...

Sorry about that wind. Not that it was my doing. If it were up to me, you would have had a perfectly calm and warm weekend. But it's not.

You'll just have to try again, right?

Anonymous said...

Glad that Pants named Candyman because I was trying to come up with the name of that movie. Now I am going to have scary hook nightmares tonight. Very comforted that older people are reading Twilight. I saw it and thought to myself vampire, seriously? The 16 year-old I used to nanny for told me I HAD to read it, now I am just waiting for her mother to be done with it! :)

Aaron said...

The spider thing does not sound familiar, but it has been years since I saw SatR. I can tell you, however, that it is a ZOMBIE movie! Only zombies in the boring, voodoo way, and not flesh-craving hordes of the undead. Also, without looking at IMDB, I can tell you that it's directed by Wes Craven and starts Bill "not to be confuse with Paxton" Pullman. If I had to guess on a year, I'd say '87?

Stefanie said...

Pants--I think I did see Candyman, though somehow I managed to push that one out of my memory. (Wish I could say the same for that damn spider scene!)

Angela--There is no shame in admitting your teenybopper loves. Guilty pleasures make the world go around, don't they?

NPW--You saw Camp Rock, too?? But... why?? :-)

Flurrious--Right. (I hope. Gah.)

Courtney--IT traumatized a whole generation (myself included). Creepy, creepy Pennywise.

L Sass--Well, you won't be the envy, as they've all already read it. ;-) They will think you are cool, however.

R--I prefer not to watch them either, so I have no idea why I saw that one.

Mickey--Right. Thanks for your sympathy anyway.

Badger Reader--You know you want to join us... (One of us... One of us...)

Aaron--Does NO ONE know the spider scene of which I speak?? If the Internet doesn't know, who CAN I ask?